For Christmas this year, they both decided they were ready to take on more pet responsibilities. My husband and I haven't been so excited about turning our home into a zoo, but agreed to it nonetheless. After doing quite a bit of research, we found a few pets who are a bit less maintenance than a dog ..... and pets that we would be willing to accept responsibility for if they actually lived until my kids hit college.
With a new animal being added almost daily to our household, it has kind of reminded me of the Christmas song "The Twelve Days of Christmas". So, in honor of my new zookeeper status and the Christmas season, I have rewritten the lyrics to this most popular Christmas tune so as to find the humor amongst the barking, glub-glubbing, pig-squealing chaos.
"On the first day of Christmas my children gave to me, a dog who really likes to pee ....everywhere.
On the second day of Christmas my children gave to me, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee....boy is it everywhere.
On the third day of Christmas my children gave to me, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee ..... on the furniture.
On the fourth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee ......no place is safe.
On the fifth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 5 neon Tetra fish..... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee.......... argh, not the sofa!
On the sixth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish..... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee ........and now poop.
On the seventh day of Christmas my children gave to me, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish.... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee ......and poops on my magazine.
On the eighth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 8 leashes to walk their critters, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish.......... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee ......good heavens what are we feeding this dog?!
On the ninth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 9 special animal foods to purchase, 8 leashes to walk their critters, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish.......... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee....... oh lordy, it's getting deep.
On the tenth day of Christmas my children gave to me, a 10 gallon fish tank, 9 animal foods to purchase, 8 leashes to walk their critters, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish........ 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee....... I'm swimming here.
On the eleventh day of Christmas my children gave to me, 11 pooper-scoopers, 10 gallon fish tank, 9 animal foods to purchase, 8 leashes to walk their critters, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish.......... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who really likes to pee and poop........ I may need a bulldozer.
On the twelfth day of Christmas my children gave to me, 12 cages to clean, 11 pooper-scoopers, 10 gallon fish tank, 9 animal foods to purchase, 8 leashes to walk critters, 7 days of guinea pig medicine, 6 broken fish tank pumps, 5 neon Tetra fish....... 4 different lizards, 3 veterinary bills, 2 guinea pigs, and a dog who has drowned me in pee......... and poop.
From my crazy zoo to you, The Redhead Sez wishes you a very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to each and every one of you! May your days be blessed and may you feel the love, joy, and comfort of the season.
Christie Bielss
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